This weekend JulzHOLLA! and I did the Omaha Women's Triathlon.
I'm not much of a feminist. Kinda liked being sort of pregnant I guess. But really, I try to maintain being a humanist more than feminist. So, that I'm attending a Women's Triathlon, well, I'm certain it's my only feminist movement. Let me explain. Women's tris are like the bras we wear - supportive in a comfortable environment.
There's a couple of guys we've met while doing all these triathlons...we ARE ON SEASON 3, you know! And the guys weren't able to do this triathlon. Cuz they're guys. But they showed up and volunteered. They helped us out of the water and unzipped our wetsuits. Which by the way, is quite a task. I'm sure they did it so they could say, "Hey, today I unzipped 400 ladies' zippers." Still, in a co-ed triathlon, no one helps you with your wet suit. But these guys did. And they were so encouraging each time I swam, biked or ran by them. So, thank you to all the men who made the triathlon so fun and easier. It really made a difference know there was a triathlon in the area y'all could have gone and done that day, but you stayed in Omaha and helped us. Thank you.
Which got me to thinking during my run at the tri, do they have Men's Only triathlons ever? Pretty much no. Gloria Steinem would shut that down for sure. For all the reasons I enjoy the Women's Triathlons (we've done two), I think there should be Men's Triathlons. Think of how fun the camaraderie and competitiveness would be. They would love it. And I think they should do it. I'll volunteer. Just let me know.
I'm pretty sure there's going to be a huge debate and issue over the temperature of the water we swam in. "Who's the jack wagon who planned an open water swim in Omaha in May?" is probably going to be mentioned more than once. I suppose I should reflect also on who's the jack wagon who would sign up for an open water swim in May in Omaha. Me, and about 300 others.
I will say, in the future of the Omaha Women's Triathlon, there should probably be a woman on staff to set it up. The mile of cobblestone to ride our bikes over was the least of our concerns. Which, by the way, men who planned a women's tri, I'm pretty sure men wouldn't have risked their balls on that. But whatever.
There was no chocolate or snack of any sort in my swag bag. We got a really nice t shirt, a sampler tube of aquaphor, and a sample packet of biofreeze. That's it. Aquaphor at a women's triathlon. Really? If you're a mom, or have tattoos, or your a mom with tattoos, the aquaphor flows plentiful. Seriously y'all, no snacks in the bag? Not even granola? Instead we got pamphlets on mental health (nice touch since we just got out of a cold lake), vaginal rejuvenation (I'm not even kidding), and plastic surgery. But I thought this triathlon would fix all that? No? Next time pal, just throw in a couple of Snickers bars.
Better yet, the snack tent was a 1/2 mile up hill from the actual finish line and transition area. So no one went to it until it was time to leave. By then, the volunteers were begging us to take as much of the food as we could because no one ate it. Well, that's because all the bagels, bananas and carb re-load is another triathlon distance away from the finish line. Please let a woman help plan the layout and donations for the swag bag next year, guys.
Ultimately, JulzHOLLA! and I had a great time. We had so much fun showing ourselves once again, that we can do this. I set a goal of under two hours and met it! It's encouraging me to keep training and keep bettering that time.
We also might have suckered a few fabulous women to do this triathlon with us. Which wasn't easy considering the lake was so chilly. Either we're THAT persuasive, or we have friends that are THAT crazy. We are proud of our crazy friends, JC and Wendy! Wendy was sent to me through facebook by a friend from Texas. Well, fine, she was already moving here and my friend hooked us up. I'm so happy to have her as my new pal and in our triathlon circle of goodness. JC won 3rd in her age group and it was her first triathlon, and it was an open water swim.
We got to introduce our new tri pals to some great ladies we've collected through triathlons as well.
It's a wonderful opportunity to get out and do a triathlon, and show your kids you can. As I was stumbling back in, the kids ran off to the side with me. And I found myself mothering while doing a triathlon. "Max, I'm almost finished right down there, meet me down there and we'll get you a bandaid. I have some in my bag." I. AM. A. BADASS. MOM. TRIATHLETE.
Here's what my kids see:
Here we are at the pre-race mandatory meeting. When you're triathletes like us, you have do attend these very important meetings.
We effn did it...again!
Post Race - we clean up pretty well, don't you think?
After that and a nap, JULZHOLLA! took me to the Usher & Akon concert for an early birthday present. I opted to sit down and rest during the slow jamz. I came to watch that guy dance...not the dry humping though. So, I rested my weary quads, back and feet during all that. When he did dance, he wowed me. Akon was fun. I'd say between the both of them, they took their shirts off 10 times. We get it. I had a lot of wardrobe changes that day too.
Usher and Akon draw what seems to be a dual themed audience of two types: women in jeans or women in ho dresses. Our whole group opted for jeans. The closest thing I have to a ho dress these days is my wetsuit. And that was drenched in lake water. Because I'm a Triathlete!
That's How I Roll.
Song of the day: Top of the World by Dev & The Cataracs (They opened up the concert. Very fun.)
Hilarious take on the OWT, girl :) I totally hear you on the swag bags! Thanks for bringing me in to your tri circle of greatness :)
Wetsuits at the Usher/Akon concert would have been totally hot. Really we would have sweat to death. But maybe we would have been called up on stage? No probably not. Not enough skin showing! I had a great day with you. I always do! Love you!