This is part of the phi slamma jamma group. It's also a good indicator that my shoulder blades are bigger than my front side. How on earth are they going to get a pic of these ladies?
Well, as promised, I got my first mammogram today.
First off, let me say, I actually felt almost privileged to get it. In the last few days, I've been on the phone with my doctor and insurance trying to confirm that indeed, a baseline mammogram for a woman at age 35 with a history of breast cancer in her family is covered on my insurance.
The colorful debate of healthcare - and I have to have a conversation with an automated, and yet fairly articulate computer lady.
"Say or use the numbers on your phone to give your date of birth."
"Hold while I verify your information."
"Hi, Leslie. This is Leslie, correct?"
God. And to even possibly suggest that these insurance companies don't care about us. The NERVE! I'm just sayin, I've got a lot of jokes to try out about the fact that I'm getting a mammogram and the computer lady isn't laughing. The lady who finally came on the phone after I just started yelling, "OPERATOR OPERATOR OPERATOR!" did however laugh.
"Are you allergic to anything?"
"Well, chocolate makes my butt and thighs swell, is that what you mean?"
Alas, we got it all worked out, and I got to go get my mammogram today. I really wasn't worried about squeezing water out of a rock, per se. Until all of the sudden, just one traffic light away, it occurred to me that small boobies are more sensitive. Dear Lord, this is going to hurt.
My sister sends me a text, "May the force be with you and may your tech have warm hands."
I shuffled through registration, three waiting rooms, a dressing room with a nice opened-front shirt. I think they called it a cape. OMG, they need to make pink capes for these suckers. And before I could think anymore about how bad this would hurt, some sweet lady not so much with warm hands, is manipulating my left beesting. I'm so tall, and she's so short, and she's trying to get this in there, and there's not much to get, and she's gotta hold it in extra long, and then almost smush her hand in there to keep the boobie in there. She's a pro though, and she got it done. Then the right. And I was done.
"Will this cause any swelling?"
"No, not at all."
"DANGIT!"
It wasn't as bad as I thought it was. Still, I think it would have been fun to wear a cape the rest of the day. Kinda like that sticker you get to wear all day when you vote or give blood. A pink cape. It would be perfect. Instead, I get my results on line, WHAT!? And I got a pink reusable grocery shopping bag. I'll take it!
And I went on about my day with my imaginary pink cape.
That's how I roll.
Confirmed!! I thought I saw you at HyVee yesterday. Loved your pink cape. One of these days I will get around to wearing the pink cape.
Do you feel good knowing that we both got the boobies squished on the same day? I do. It was my third tho...
I think we should all wear imaginary pink capes every day! I'm about to begin my battle with insurance on why a 37 year old with a history of breast cancer in the family needs a mammogram too. Wish me luck. Save the Ta-tas!
I was horrified, thinking that you were getting your first mammogram on line, or even worse, by phone. Those are a terrible rip-off. Then you do get to the right place, and they have you locked in, and they have the nerve to say, "Now, hold your breath!" AS IF....you could even breathe under those circumstances. I've never been provided a pink "cape", either.
I forget to take the markers off, and the tiny BB's on the nipples (I can say that on line....can't I?) Hubby thinks I've had day surgery while he was at work.....You can only milk that one for so long....Ooops! Sorry about that one.