How to silence and shock the Mom on the Rock and leave her speechless

Max occasionally gets to play with the kid across the street but he goes out of town a lot of weekends and so, today (Friday) when he went to see if Pal could play, he was the happiest kid in the world because pal, indeed, could play today. Yay!

Pal got a PSP for Christmas, and has brought it over the last two days he's come over. Typically, I would frown on the handheld video games for playtime, however, I was impressed with how Pal shares it and shows the kids how to play and even hands it over and lets them play.

Until today. Today, Pal has his wrestling game. And while I'm making the family a lovely hearty soup with my dress and my pearls and my apron on, and the kids play happily, I hear the following conversation:

"Dude, I can text a real wrestler! Wanna see?"

"Mom, Pal can TEXT on his PSP!!!!"

"Super."

I hear the clicking of the PSP and then I hear Lucy read it outloud, because, thank God for now, that's the only way she reads.

Very slowly and awkwardly, she reads outloud: "Eat My Dick."

And in my best Mom voice, I glide through the kitchen, look around corner and say, "What did you just say?"

The SIX-YEAR OLD kid WROTE and DIRECTED some cyber freakshow. And he knew he was in big trouble immediately. I don't know what to do. Ricardo got home and I had Pal repeat what he just wrote. With shame in his voice. I don't know what to do and am utterly speechless.

I'm pretty sure I was a potty-mouth at an early age. When I was in HIGH SCHOOL, and riding home from a CHURCH YOUTH GROUP function, my pal, Beck's mom, Miss Polly, had picked us up. I was in the back seat, and someone pulled out and almost hit us, and I yelled "SHIT!" really loud. The look from Miss Polly's eyes in the rear view mirror has left me scarred for life with guilt. I can imagine she was thinking, "Super, looks like this church stuff is really working out well." I apologized and Miss Polly accepted. I will never forget that look. But I just knew the basic bad words, to make a suggestion like that. Maybe it's because I'm a girl. Pal comes from a house full of boys.Except his mom.

And I'm guessing from the lack of response from last summer when I emailed Pal's mom and explained I'd busted the kids outside peeing on the tree - I'm guessing to call and tell on her son isn't the fix here. Holy cow. Six years old. Unbelievable.

I didn't know what to do or say so I blogged about it. After I have a talk with the kids and shower the ick off, I'll be better, I suppose. I do find joy in the fact that my kids don't know what dick means. Whew.

One day - probably tomorrow - I'll laugh and laugh about this.So, hey PAL - thanks for SHARING.
That's how I roll.