I don't put presents under the tree before Christmas morning for two reasons. Number one: when you go from 0 to 30 presents under the tree, it doesn't matter who the presents are for, the kids might as well have Mickey Mouse, Santa Clause and the Jonas Brothers in the living room. It's that big of a fabulous Christmas visual. And number two: Farley destroys the presents.
But last week, Farley the Wonder Dog, desperate because there were no presents to destroy nor reveal to the kids, opted to start working on ornaments. And they were apple ornaments. And apparently, when chewed, then left on the floor, it stains my brand new carpet hot pink. I realize they are apples, and maybe look edible. But there are APPLES on my kitchen counter. He won't eat them. I've even dropped a few on the floor in my day, and the dog won't eat them.
Some of you, I can see through the screen, are laughing hysterically at Farley's ways and the Christmas Kharma I've come up against. Never in all my blogs have I gotten more of a reaction than the one about the Christmas letters,not even the one where I had my tubes tied. I am fairly certain I've EVEN been cut off from a couple of your Christmas Letter lists, because I haven't even gotten a reciprocation card back. The horror. So, please know my intent was to reach out, to uh, spark creativity. I appreciate hearing from all of you, bland and boring, sad and ironic, or completely repeated from the last year. I love seeing pictures of your children, even though you're taking all the fun out of seeing how fat or really tired, or the last desperate attempt at reinventing yourself hair cut and color gone really bad. I've had a few in my own days people. You know it! So, I stand firm in my plea for creativity and inclusion of all family members. However, I'm not judging the personal cards I receive. Just making mention of a few suggestions to the general Christmas correspondence goers.
And that's how I roll.
How is Farley still alive? God seriously loves that dog.